thursday.

i did it. i defriended zach and his little homestead crew on facebook and blocked him on aim. so there shall be no more reminders in my minifeed or on my buddylist. im so proud of myself, because although its easy to click buttons on the computer, its hard to tell myself that this really is the end. which it is. im certain.

today was sorta boring, but also sorta...invigorating? that isnt the word for it. i was definately antsy all day, but not because things with ethan were awkward. they were just the opposite, actually. it felt like about a thousand pounds was lifted off my chest all at once. like i didnt have to hold anything else in, because he'd already read it all. that felt really good, actually. it just felt like he was a little bit confrontational about it. which is totally understandable. considering what he ready, im really suprised that he wasnt like, seething. but thats guys for you. i dont think ive ever been able to acomplish making a boy mad at me for more than like, five minutes at a time. i guess i dont have the kind of skill. whatever works, though. all he needs to do now is figure out that the more he tries to press and the faster he tries to go, the longer im going to want to wait. and im especially not feeling the whole 'right now' thing. im loving being single. i feel quite..free. i could really get used to it. ashley sat with us at lunch today, and i enjoyed that. im glad things are getting better between us.

the first issue of the charger comes out tomorrow, and im ridiculously excited. i dont quite know why, but something about journalism just fascinates me. being on newspaper is so exciting and i have so much fun. like today was amazingly exciting, even though we did absolutely nothing except sit and then go and chill in c lunch. i think that i might possibly want to intern at a magazine either before or after art school [or during, like LC] to get a taste of what thats like. i doubt itll be anything like a school paper, but still. we have good times in the a&e section. its my best class of the day, by far. well, actually...drawing is tied for first, but thats a given. ive been trying to think about my portrait, and ive mostly been drawing blanks. its highly unlikely that ill do the subject that i was considering doing, because it would be a little awkward and it wouldnt be expressive enough. or at least, i dont think it would be. but people surprise me every day. and a sidenote, while im on suprises...the end of breaking dawn was suprisingly suckish. like, i was so dissapointed because she just left me hanging on so many things. but she has plenty of room to keep going with her story. soo, theres hope.

im super excited about the strong possibility that september 27 will be the best day of my entire life. like, you dont even know. and im not going to tell you until i know for sure, or at least have some idea of whether or not its a yes or a no. but if its a yes...oh my goodness. i will be so happy.
love, kaatie