my mind works in interesting ways.

well, carroll LOST its HOMECOMING GAME for the SECOND year in a ROW. wow. i just wanted to point out why thats so embarassing. i wish i went somewhere else. i dont know where exactly, but carrolls pretty lame. my dad mentioned something about moving to maryland the other day. and that sounds pretty amazing right now, no lie. a fresh start would be nice. i just have way too much going on right now to deal with to be content. i feel a little antsy and very nostalgic. its kinda lame, how little things make me feel insanely sad, or how big things [well, big things that happen to other people] have no effect on me whatsoever. its like, no one cares about my problems, so i have to focus on not like, freaking out all the time, and that means i cant focus on being other peoples therapist all the time like i used to. and then they all get super pissy and so on and so forth, blah blah blah, it creates drama. i dont know. im just not a compassionate person right now. i wont detail because i dont really want to think about some things that were said to me tonight at the game. i really dont want to get back on and read what im thinking right now. i just want it to be buried, like so many other painful things. that reminds me of an amy tan quote.

music is keeping me going right now. and newspaper class, which if i wasnt so busy, i would allow to consume my life. unfortunately for me, i have a HUGE crush on someone in that class that i havent mentioned on this. its unfortunate because im currently on my single quest right now. and because i have absolutely NO shot in the world, probably because hes super smart and funny and cute [smokin!] and talented anddd...my god. now hes someone i would date in a heartbeat. im not sure i want to tell anyone about this, like out loud in a confessional sort of way. because that would make it too real for me. hopefully this is going to pass. and soon. but ohhh god. i kinda cant stop thinking about it...and how he initiated conversation twice today. and yesterday. and the day before that. who even knows. my mind works in strange ways.

golf sectionals are tomorrow and i really dont know how i feel about that.
love, kaatie