a day[and night]dream.

one of two things will probably result from my specific intentions for life: either im going to achieve all or most of them, or live a totally different life than the one im about to describe and be unhappy. or ill succumb to a 9 to 5, white picket fence, white collar...the american dream. whatever the hell that is.

no. thats totally NOT what i want to be like when i grow up. it all seems so boring, cliche, redundant...if you know me you know how i feel about that. i want to be creative and fashionable and intelligent and meaningful and mysterious as an adult. i want to make my own choices and have my own beliefs. i want to have fun and be rediculously, adorably, and hopelessly in love. i want to take risks and have fun, which shouldnt be too hard to do in nyc. and i also [seriously] want to be poor. to struggle. dont get me wrong though, i like living where i do and doing all the exciting sports and activities i do. thats great, and im so grateful to my parents for giving me this life. but when i get older, i dont want to have everything handed to me. i admit that it is now. and its awkward for me to talk to people who are worried about money, because ive never had to be. it doesnt matter to me if i have to live from paycheck to paycheck. i just want to be happy and have friends and have fun.

so. life plans as of right now: im going to survive sophomore year and the first half of junior year. then im going to spend the second half of junior year in spain. speaking spanish and being chic in europe. and maintaining the long distance relationship with zach like a pro, of course. he'll fly over and visit me for a week over spring break. then ill come home all coolified and breeze through senior year. after i graduate, i leave. as soon as i can. ill be starting as a fashion design major at the pratt institute in the fall, with about half of the tuition payed for by a talent scholarship, and the rest payed for by..student loans. anyway. fashion school in new york city. whoaa, what an amazing time thatll be. ill design, learn, party, shop...you get the idea. ill live in a studio apartment in tribeca and commute to school. eventually, when zach finishes doing whatever hes going to be doing, he'll move to new york with me. after a while, marriage? who knows. but eventually, yes. we'll have one little girl a year later, named roane shay, and about that same time my line that ive been working on through a design firm will get big. really big. ill break away from the firm but keep my small following with me to help me get my own line started. roane will be alot like me: unique, driven. and shes gonna be a redhead. dont even argue with me on that one. anyway. she'll go to a competitive private school and not be that into learning and stuff, but do fine. our little family will spend summers in our little house on the beach on nantucket island. ill design and be in love and be totally happy.

yeah, its gonna be pretty great.
love, kaatie